Find your Why, Find your Way

Following up on a recent rant I had about US Soccer ending the Development Academy, I wanted to remind everyone that even though they took the program away, they didn’t take the ball away—it’s still at every child’s feet.

And while we’re at it, since we’re spending a little less time in isolation— and slowly getting more time on the soccer field with friends, teams, coaches and competition—let’s look at the positive.

We can choose to see the demise of the DA as one big problem or we can embrace it as one giant opportunity.

If your child aspires to become a better soccer player, lean into the latter. “Why?” You ask?

For starters, taking a break from the game can do amazing things for your child. It allows them to recharge and refocus. You might already even see it with a renewed interest in playing in the backyard or at recently opened practices. If they’re injured, it gives them time without pressure to recover. If they have low energy, they can revive it.

One of the best ways to get them back on top and feeling great about the game, is as simple as having them ask themselves this straightforward question: Why do you play soccer? Do you play because it’s fun? Who do you play for? What is it about the game that keeps you coming back for more?

We all have different reasons and by getting real with those reasons, we not only learn a lot about ourselves but also our motivations. Understanding your WHY is very powerful. So, let’s tap into that power.

When you’re searching for your WHY, you’re basically searching for your purpose—that indescribable thing that gets you up every day to train, play and improve. And you know what, that WHY applies on and off the field.  

Knowing your purpose helps you find your true passion. And there’s nothing like passion to turn your goals into accomplishments and keep your tank full of optimism while doing so.

If you don’t have passion or purpose, you’re not going to have the fuel to get you through those tough times. You’ll get stuck and not be able to move forward, let alone accomplish what you want.

When I was a young player, I simply played the game because it was fun. Because this was my WHY it made me want to get out and play more. The more I played, the better I got. Getting better made things more fun and that gave me lots of fuel.

Of course along the way, your why may evolve. I know mine certainly did. When I first started to play, I did it because it was fun—I got to meet people and see my friends. Later on, when I got better, having fun shifted to setting goals and more importantly accomplishing those goals. That became my WHY.

One of those goals was to make an elite level team. When I tried out for it the first time, I didn’t make the cut. I was devastated, but I knew my WHY and that made the difference. Instead of giving up, I dug in deeper and spent the summer honing my skills at a soccer camp. And camp didn’t end when my parents picked me up. I brought camp home. I got better and better and better until it was time to try-out again.

This time, I made the B team and I was thrilled. I put in the work because I knew my WHY. I accomplished what I set out to do and that filled me with joy—that joy only fueled my passion even further.

My boyhood experience taught me two things I still hold true. First, if you’re really passionate about something, hard work can actually be fun. And second, only with hard work and dedication can you achieve big goals—you know the ones that require more of you than you have right now, the ones that force you to grow. I didn’t know it then, but I discovered the transformative power of determination—something I consider one of our best hidden gems. From determination, I started to develop values. Those values lead toward goal-setting and ultimately goal-accomplishing. In other words, by finding my WHY, I found my WAY.

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